“you’re going to lose a star…”


We’ve been thinking about allowance- do you get allowance “just because” or do you have to do chores to earn it? Do you do chores because you are a part of the famiy and everyone does their part? Do you get $ for good behavior or grades? ACK!!

We decided that yes, she needs to earn her $$, but not necessarily by doing chores, but by being helpful and listening well (making good choices).

Avery does like to get change to put in her piggy bank. When the piggy bank gets full we take it to a Coin Star and get CASH! Then we let her spend it after she “gives some to God.” We’ve done this twice so far.

Dan and I brainstormed and came up with a “system.” I made up a chart with (velcro) stars. She starts each day with 5 stars. During the day she can lose them by whining, not listening and “making wrong choices.” She can also earn more stars by being extra helpful and being a good listener… At the end of the day we tally up how many stars are left.

star chart
star chart

I was fortunate enough to make it to Target when they put their toys on clearance, 75% off. I bought a few little things for SUPER CHEAP! Each toy can be bought from me for a certain number of points. Avery has earned her first toy for 10 points, it took her 4 days to earn it.

She earned it!!
She earned it!!

We think that later on each star will be worth 5 cents. Then she can add the money to her piggy bank.

If, at the end of the day, if she has NO stars left, she doesn’t get any books before bed- the worst thing ever!! Thankfully, she has not had that happen yet!!

I like this system because;
* She can lose and earn more stars
* She can use her points to “buy” a toy from us.
* It is a daily thing, not a weekly thing to work up to

It helps that Dan and I are both “in this” together. She doesn’t want to lose a star from either of us!!


5 responses to ““you’re going to lose a star…””

  1. we still haven’t come up with a successful plan that we, as parents stick to. we’ve got two problems that we just need to talk about and really decide what we’re gonna do.

    1. they never spend what’s in their piggy banks because we never really think about it, this isn’t as big a deal, i just feel bad that they have “all this” money and when they’re whining about wanting a new something we just say, “no, ask for it for christmas/birthday.”

    2. we just kinda haphazardly offer them money to do something when they’re complaining about not wanting to do it. which is admittedly completely terrible.

    but thanks for posting about this, because i’m thinking this will start a real conversation about it with lisa and we can actually come up with a legitimate plan.

  2. I LOVE your idea! You two are a great parenting team, and this will be a great benefit to her when she’s older, not just to earn toys now. EXCELLENT! (PS. I’m going to use this for my kid when the times comes!)

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